My First Book

Marriage is hard work. So many people told me that before I got married. I honestly had no idea. My (naive) reply was, "well, we really love each other."

Jeremy and I received premarital counseling by the minister who married us. Looking back there is one major issue that was not addressed during this time... How to Share a Bed with Your Significant Other. Wow, talk about a major issue faced by couples around the world!

 

There are so many conflicts that arise from sharing a bed. This is exactly what I mean when I say I am still learning to coexist with my other half. For nineteen years I slept in a bed by myself. It was twenty years for Jeremy, then one day, we say I do and everything changes. How can two individuals make such a dramatic change work?!

Jeremy prefers the temperature to be below freezing and I have to admit that I am not a fan of frostbite. During our first fall together as a married couple, I had a small space heater on my side of the bed and he had a small fan on his side. Counterproductive, maybe. I'd like to think we were just compromising.

I just can't understand why someone that feels the need to keep the temperature setting so low also feels the need to hog the blanket! Yes, most nights I awake to find that my share of our blanket has disappeared and I am left to tolerate the cold on my own.

I will never forget the first time this happened. I was shivering to death as I tapped Jeremy on the shoulder and sweetly whispered, "I'm c-c-c-c-cold. Can I have some covers?" My dear husband was more than willing to comply. Tragically, the moment I sat up to help myself to the blanket, he powerfully threw his arm back to cover me back up. The result was his fist very suddenly meeting my face.

Now, I know this was an accident and Jeremy apologized sincerely. This could have been avoided had we known beforehand the difficulties of sharing a bed. I am certainly no marriage expert but I'd love to see someone tackle this pressing topic. In my spare time (lol, like that exists) I'll be writing my first book appropriately titled, How to Share a Bed with Your Significant Other. I'll be addressing key complaints such as...

"My husband snores too loud!"

"Help, my wife is torturing me with her ice cold feet."

"My significant other won't stop passing gas in the middle of the night!"

"My wife's hairy legs feel like a cactus."

"I can't stand my spouse's terrible morning breath!"

"My husband could fillet a fish with those toenails!"

For now, I'd love to hear your bedtime complaints as well as any advice you may have to offer!