Rookie Mistake

I did something bad last night. Something I regret terribly. My mother raised me better than this. Last night, I went to the grocery store without a list. Nooooo list. I can't even say I forgot the list; I just flat out did not even make one.

It gets worse.

I was hungry too! That's right. I went to the grocery store without a list while I was hungry. I might as well have done my grocery shopping in a fast food restaurant. I spent way too much time in the frozen food isle.

Now, I do have a good excuse. It has been a crazy week. We just returned from Texas, where we spent Christmas with my in-laws. A ten hour drive with a 2 year-old and a 6 month-old will make anyone at least a little crazy. On top of that my grandpa had a heart attack on Christmas Eve, I came down with some kind of flu and my mom was taken to the hospital Tuesday night. Apparently Mom's blood pressure was a whopping 236 over 118!

Things are slowly getting back to normal around here. In the meantime I guess we'll just have to deal with having chili-cheese fries for dinner and Ben and Jerry's for dessert.

New Family Tradition

We began a new family tradition this year. Well, at least I hope we did. Only time will tell.

We made and decorated a birthday cake for Jesus! After all CHRIST-mas is about the birth of Jesus Christ. It seems like Christmas has lost its true meaning. Hopefully this will be a fun way for our family to remember what it's all about.

I'm pretty sure Noah (and Jeremy) ate more candy than he actually put on the cake.



Happy Birthday Jesus!



Be careful what you ask

Be careful what you ask; you might not like the answer you get.

The other day I was examining my face in the mirror when I turned to
Jeremy and asked, "do you notice anything about my nose?"

He looked at me for a few seconds and replied, "yeah, it's kind of crooked."

"What!?" I shrieked, "I meant, Can you tell I'm getting a pimple?!"

"Oh yeah, that too." he said.

Metal Chairs

This is the first of many David Stories I hope to share. It had to have been at least 10 years ago. Mom, Dad, David and I shuffled into the second to the back row at Matt's 5th grade music concert. We had just settled into our metal folding chairs. I probably would have never remembered that night if it weren't for David.

That "up-to-no-good" smile came over David's face and he began to lean hard to the left. Bbbbbbbbbrrrrrrrrrrr!!!

My eye's nearly popped out of my head! David had just farted and there is no doubt in my mind that every person in that crowded gymnasium knew. David happens to be a proud farter and made sure everyone knew where it came from. He laughed so loud and shouted, "I'm just like my Dad!"

We had all hoped that David would quiet down quickly but that was not the case. Dad was very embarrassed and was frantically trying to calm David down. "Shh, shh, shh. Watch your brother sing. Watch your brother sing!" It was no use.

Immediately after the concert ended, we were greeted by some friends of the family. Sure enough they had heard the whole thing and they were sitting in the front row! Even Matt knew what happened and he was singing with the rest of the 5th graders.

David and Matt 2004

Word of advice: Never pass gas while sitting in a metal chair.

David makes so many people laugh. If you have had the pleasure of meeting David, what's your David Story?

Why I no longer text and drive...

Don't worry, I'm not about to give a lecture on the dangers of texting and driving (which is probably much needed). More so I am sharing why I no longer text and drive. Just a few weeks ago I was taking Noah and Asa to see Grandma, Grandpa, Uncle David and Uncle Matt. During that 30 mile ride something happened that changed my views on texting and driving forever. 

 

On this particular day I had passed several police cars. Fortunately, I was watching my speed. Being the caring, older sister that I am, I sent a friendly text message to Matt reminding him to watch his speed. I knew he'd be leaving for work any minute. The following is our text message conversation.

Me: Lots of cops out today. watch your speed.

Matt: You get pulled over?

Me: No I'm too fart. (let me remind you my eyes were on the road so I was unable to spell check my texts)

Matt: I know you are.

Me: I just passed you getting on the highway.

Matt: you passed me getting in the highway huh?

Me: Yea. You see me waving?

Matt: You need to stop texting and driving.

Me: Why? you are?

At this time, I arrived safely at mom and dad's to realize that Matt's car was still parked in the driveway. I am beginning to wonder how I've made it this long texting and driving.

I Don't Wanna Grow Up

If you are a facebook user, you've surely seen all the cute little cartoon profile pictures filling your news feed. What's the deal?

Well, here's what's going around:  

Change your FB profile picture to a cartoon
from your childhood. The goal? To not see a human face on FB till
Monday. Join the fight against child abuse, copy &
paste to your status and invite your friends to do the same!


Apparently this latest trend started last month and originated in Greece.


First of all, I must admit I changed my picture and my status. But seriously, how is this fighting child abuse? Well I don't know but it sure is fun! I've really enjoyed seeing all of my friends profile pics. For once I haven't had to photoshop my profile pic to make myself look decent. I just threw up a picture of my favorite cartoon! Here are some of my favorite cartoons growing up. What was yours?

Yum Yums

 

Christmas Card Photo

This morning, I drug the boys down to the portrait studio for our first annual Jobson Family Christmas Photo. It was a terrific experience. Noah was well behaved for at least 5 1/2 minutes, just enough time to snap a couple of good photos. Asa was pretty good too. He waited till after the photo shoot to spit up all over us! Here are the results...

One Happy Family! Wait, isn't that the Hamburger Helper slogan?

Stuck in the Middle

I have mentioned on my About Me page that I am an unfortunate middle child. Luckily I am in the middle of two crazy awesome brothers, Matt and David. My older brother David is 26. He has an epilepsy disorder and is mentally challenged. He is by far one of the most amazing people anyone could ever meet. Poor Matt, the youngest of us at age 21, has to follow in the foot steps of David and I. Just kidding. Matt is an awesome wrestler and a natural born leader. I pray that he chooses to use his leadership skills in a way that glorifies God.

Since I no longer live with Mom, Dad, Matt and David, I miss out on a lot of crazy fun (although my boys and husband make up for most of that crazy fun). I could write a book of David Stories. David is such an inspiration. He see the world from a unique perspective. Even when his health is at its worst, he keeps his spirits up. If you were to ask, "How are you, David," the answer would always be "good." If only I could remain half as positive during times of trial.

What I mean by David Stories is that David is constantly doing something to make you smile whether he means to or not. Every time I see David, he tattles on his baby brother saying, "Matt got out of the yard again!" Also, David insists that at the age of 24, I still want a Barbie jeep for Christmas. It would takes years to write about all the funny moments David has created. He still adds to the list daily. I'd love to share his stories with the world so hopefully I can begin to through this blog.

Tis the Season...

Here at the Jobson house we are munching on Thanksgiving leftovers and pulling out the Christmas decor. We will be putting up our tree this evening. Asa started crawling about a week ago so this could be interesting.

Noah is in the Christmas Spirit as well! While I had my hands full with Asa, Noah decided to do a little "decorating" of his own. He got in to my Christmas sprinkles and emptied the entire jar in my kitchen!

What a mess! I swept, vacuumed, swept some more, and mopped. I'm still finding red and green sprinkles.

Give Thanks!

Here are some things I am Thankful for at the moment. God Bless and have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

I am Thankful for...

My Husband

Chocolate

Warm, comfy sweaters

Christmas Music

Naps...Peace at last

My Church

My Boys

My family

Friends

My Savior

And much more!


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P.S. Check out my new prayer page!

Christmas Gift Idea

If you're like me and are on a tight Christmas gift budget, I have a wonderful, inexpensive gift idea for Noah. Maybe you know another child that would be just as happy.  It's simple really.

How about a Cardboard box? Noah very much enjoys playing with any cardboard box. Wanna go the extra mile? Take a large box, cut out squares for windows and a door. You can even decorate with crayons! You'll provide hours of happiness and feed the imagination of children without breaking the bank.

If only adults were half as simple.

Noah's Christmas List

Christmas is quickly approaching and I've already been asked, "What would Noah like for Christmas?" So I asked him. Since I know it is quite difficult to understand Noah's speech, I will go ahead and translate his wishes to the rest of the world. Now, remember this is what he asked for.

1.) No noise makers
2.) No assembly required
3.) No batteries required
4.) No small parts
5.) Nothing containing many pieces
6.) No animals
7.) No hand-wash only clothing
8.) No dry-clean only clothing
9.) No white clothing
10.) No, No, No Musical instruments!!!!

Thank you! Have a wonderful and blessed Holiday Season!

Christmas 2009

The Pearly Gates

 

I received the following e-mail this morning for the 109th time.

A fellow finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates.
St. Peter explains that its not so easy to get in heaven.
There are some criteria before entry is allowed.
For example, was the man religious in life? Attend church? No?
St. Peter told him that's bad.
Was he generous? give money to the poor? Charities? No?
St. Peter told him that that too was bad.
Did he do any good deeds? Help his neighbor? Anything? No?
St. Peter was becoming concerned. Exasperated, Peter says, "Look, everybody does something nice sometime.
Work with me, I'm trying to help. Now think!"

The man says, "There was this old lady. I came out of a store and found her
surrounded by a dozen Hell's Angels. They had taken her purse and were shoving
her around, taunting and abusing her. I got so mad I threw my bags down,
fought through the crowd, and got her purse back. I then helped her to her feet.
I then went up to the biggest, baddest biker and told him how despicable,
cowardly and mean he was and then spat in his face".

"Wow", said Peter, "That's impressive. When did this happen"?
"Oh, about 10 minutes ago", replied the man. 

I have heard some funny "pearly gate" jokes over the years. Most of them allude to men earning their way into heaven. I am so thankful we don't have to earn our way into heaven. That's right, it doesn't matter how good you are, the Bible makes it clear that you cannot earn your way into heaven. Going to church doesn't get you in nor does being generous or caring. 

  

(Ephesians 2:8-9) - "For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, that no one should boast."

I admit that I am so far from perfect and would never make it to heaven on my own. Thank you God for your amazing gift of grace to your children.

******************************************

I realize that not everyone shares the same views. I'd love to hear your thoughts on what happens after death. I just ask that you are respectful of others.

 

My First Book

Marriage is hard work. So many people told me that before I got married. I honestly had no idea. My (naive) reply was, "well, we really love each other."

Jeremy and I received premarital counseling by the minister who married us. Looking back there is one major issue that was not addressed during this time... How to Share a Bed with Your Significant Other. Wow, talk about a major issue faced by couples around the world!

 

There are so many conflicts that arise from sharing a bed. This is exactly what I mean when I say I am still learning to coexist with my other half. For nineteen years I slept in a bed by myself. It was twenty years for Jeremy, then one day, we say I do and everything changes. How can two individuals make such a dramatic change work?!

Jeremy prefers the temperature to be below freezing and I have to admit that I am not a fan of frostbite. During our first fall together as a married couple, I had a small space heater on my side of the bed and he had a small fan on his side. Counterproductive, maybe. I'd like to think we were just compromising.

I just can't understand why someone that feels the need to keep the temperature setting so low also feels the need to hog the blanket! Yes, most nights I awake to find that my share of our blanket has disappeared and I am left to tolerate the cold on my own.

I will never forget the first time this happened. I was shivering to death as I tapped Jeremy on the shoulder and sweetly whispered, "I'm c-c-c-c-cold. Can I have some covers?" My dear husband was more than willing to comply. Tragically, the moment I sat up to help myself to the blanket, he powerfully threw his arm back to cover me back up. The result was his fist very suddenly meeting my face.

Now, I know this was an accident and Jeremy apologized sincerely. This could have been avoided had we known beforehand the difficulties of sharing a bed. I am certainly no marriage expert but I'd love to see someone tackle this pressing topic. In my spare time (lol, like that exists) I'll be writing my first book appropriately titled, How to Share a Bed with Your Significant Other. I'll be addressing key complaints such as...

"My husband snores too loud!"

"Help, my wife is torturing me with her ice cold feet."

"My significant other won't stop passing gas in the middle of the night!"

"My wife's hairy legs feel like a cactus."

"I can't stand my spouse's terrible morning breath!"

"My husband could fillet a fish with those toenails!"

For now, I'd love to hear your bedtime complaints as well as any advice you may have to offer!

I'd like to thank...

Look what I got...

Ramblings of a Frantic Mother gave me this award a few weeks ago. How sweet was that?!?! And I thought only my mom read my blog. 

Thanks Frantic Mom!

Future Voter

 

 

 

Noah proudly displays his sticker for voting yesterday

First of all, I'd like to apologize to anyone voting at precinct 40.01 yesterday that may have been bothered by my "future voter."

Second of all, if I can take two small children with me to vote, there is nothing I can't do. (Apparently there are many things I cannot do!)

I waited till about 2 o'clock in the afternoon yesterday to venture out to the polls. I figured that would be the slow time of day. Much to my surprise, the polls were still very busy. I picked up my ballot and with a baby carrier in one hand, Noah in the other, I pressed the ballot between my lips so I could shuffle to a table. "Ma'am, that is no way to treat an official ballot."

I sat down at a table. Asa was asleep peacefully in  his car seat (thank God!) I sat Noah in the chair next to me and said, "shhh, we must be very quiet." He smiled back at me, held his finger up to his mouth and repeated the words back. I began filling out my ballot as quickly as possible.

Within moments, Noah began waving and shouting hi to everyone in the room. Only a few people cared enough to glance up from their ballots. After another "shhh" from me, Noah proceeded to remove his jacket, shoes and socks! Oh well, at least he is being quiet I thought.

I only had two more circles to fill in when Noah suddenly jumped out of his chair and made a run for it. He went straight for the voting booths (all of which were full.) He was running right underneath them! I had no choice but to get down on my hands and knees and go after him. I didn't have a chance to look around but I'm pretty sure we had everyone in the rooms attention.

Noah must have thought this was a game. When he saw me coming after him, he started laughing and ran faster! I don't know what I would have done if a poll worker wouldn't have stepped in to catch him. *Sigh* In a frustrated tone she said to me, "I'll get his shoes back on him while you turn your ballot in."

I rushed through the rest of my ballot before turning it in. I gathered my belongings and we were (shamefully) on our way out the door but not before Noah had a chance to tell everyone bye!

I just pray that in the future I am still allowed to vote. If I am, I am soooo leaving the kids in the car! (Not really but it's tempting)

Mommy's Lil Monsters

We had a wonderful Halloween!

The boys were not thrilled about wearing costumes at first.

 

 

 Eventually they got used to them

 My crazy lil monkey

 My sweet lil banana

I hope you all had a wonderful Halloween too. I'm so ready for Christmas now!

Kids in Cars

Is it ever OK to leave a little kid in a car alone? Even for just a second?


I haven't but I've got to admit the thought has crossed my mind more than once.

It's frustrating that sometimes it takes longer to get the boys out of the car than it does to run an errand. I hate returning our Red Box dvds. Seriously, it takes like 30 seconds to return the DVD but 10 minutes to get the boys out of the car and back in again. I just CAN'T leave them in there alone though. I mean what if someone steals them?! Ahhhhh. (I know they'd bring them back after 30 minutes.)


Well, I think I've answered my own question. I'll never forget my older brother David putting our vehicle in drive (on more than one occasion). I jumped out the back as our van rolled slowly down the street. Once he drove our Blazer right into the garage door! He did all of this with adults just a feet away (sneaky kid!)


I guess I should be thankful Noah can't get out of his car seat by himself.

Guys, I just gagged!

So, I'm in the kitchen fixing dinner when Noah comes up and says "here momma."

I didn't think much of it and without looking, held my hand out to accept his offering.

I let out a horrified shriek, as I looked down at the gift he had placed in my hand!

Much to my relief it was only play-doh. Whew. Seriously, brown play-doh? What were the makers thinking? I'm considering writing them another letter. 

Anyways, I've got some good prank ideas for Jeremy. I can't wait for him to come home. (evil laughter)

Skip the Poo

No, this is not another one of my toddler's poop stories.

I was at this dentist office earlier this week. I was reading a magazine while patiently waiting for the dentist to come check out my teeth. I stumbled across an article about skipping shampoo.

Apparently many people are completely skipping shampoo for many reasons. 1.) Save money 2.) Eco friendly- Fewer plastic bottles and chemicals 3.) Healthier and shinier hair.

It sounds kind of strange. The first two reasons make sense but how can not shampooing be healthier for your hair? According to the article shampoo strips  your hair of it's natural oils. Hmmm. Ok, that makes sense.

I think I'll give it a try (when I run out of the bottle I already have.) I could probably go without shampoo but there is no way I could skip the conditioner.

What do you think? Could you skip the poo?

Potty Like a Rockstar

We have been struggling to get Noah potty trained for some time now. Finally, we are making some progress.

In an effort to encourage Noah to use the potty, we took him with us to pick out BIG boy undies this weekend. Even if he didn't really understand what was going on, he was thrilled. As we approached the toddler section, we told him he could pick out which ever ones he wanted ( as long as they were for boys of course!) Sure enough, he pointed and shouted "Cars!" We had to pry them out of his arms just so we could check out!

We have kept our usual potty schedule, reminding him frequently to use the potty. However, instead of wearing just diapers, we have put him in undies for a couple of hours a day. The past few days have been rough. Let's just say I had to use the carpet cleaner more than a few times.

Job Security

Another example of what happens when you take your eyes off of a two year old, even when it's only for a minute.

 

 I made spaghetti for dinner tonight. Jeremy called and I checked the score to the Rangers game for him. It took me maybe 90 seconds.

 

Apparently, somebody was hungry. He helped himself to some meat sauce right off the stove top. (No worries, the stove was off and it was completely cooled.) 

 

 

I gave him a towel and made him help clean the mess up.

My mom tells me that stuff like this is just job security.